Welcome back to the unending torment that is blogging week. Today’s meme is a barrage of banality I like to call Thursday Thirty-Seven, which weighs in with nearly three times the tedious trivia of its mundane cousin, Thursday Thirteen.

For those seeking to replicate this decent into the cheesy depths of meme-hood, the thing to keep in mind about a good Thursday Thirty-Seven is that it is not bound by the constraints of accuracy and accountability that limit lesser lists. In fact, entertainment value rates far higher than literal truth. So if you have stockpiled a sufficient supply of caffeine and are properly belted in, let’s get started:

1. I have brought forth three offspring upon the earth. (The Hot Comma Momma did most of the work, but until she gets her own list or they do something really bad, I’m taking credit.)
2. I am proud to say that I still have possession of my appendix.
3. I once jumped off a pier into the Pacific ocean to impress a girl.
4. I myself was quite unimpressed to discover the water was only four feet deep at the time.
5. I have relaxed on the white sands beaches of Aruba.
6. I have discovered that the other 99% of that happy island is comprised of jagged rocks, cacti, and sweat.
7. I once jumped out of a helicopter into Lake Tahoe
8. Soon after, I received the mother of all brain-freezes from the year-round arctic water temperatures.
9. I am frequently recognized for my mugging preparedness.
10. I was once a foster parent.
11. I was once a child.
12. I was once above these kinds of lists.
13. I once received a medal from the government of Kuwait as their way of saying, “Goodbye and thanks for all the oil.”
14. I am pro-Nebraska
15. I once found it necessary to use a four-seat outhouse. It was already at ¾ occupancy at the time.
16. I have crossed glaciers on Mt. Hood
17. I’m in a band.
18. My wife is my groupie.
19. I’ve never been to Boston in the fall.
20. I am allergic to cats and consider them all to be lazy wastes of carbon.
21. Although I don’t usually mention it, my kids often crack me up.
22. I met my wife, the Hot Comma Momma, in high school.
23. It took her quite a while to be smitten by my charms.
24. Actually, she hated me.
25. But I won in the end, which has been the ongoing theme of our relationship.
26. By certain, quite low standards, I am a professional actor and voice actor (Shameless plug warning.)
27. I once received the following statement in a performance review: “Brent is a good marine, but he thinks too much.”
28. I once turned down a promotion because I didn’t want to cut my hair.
29. I was born at a young age.
30. I often laugh at my own jokes.
31. This trait frequently disturbs my children.
32. Although a lot of people talk to themselves from time to time, I am the only one I know to get written correspondence from myself.
33. I once moved completely across the country to attend music school.
34. Once there, I discovered I was a painfully average musician.
35. I also found out I was a fairly decent writer.
36. I have a history test tonight.
37. I really need to study.

So there you have it, Thursday Thirty-Seven. Can you guess which ones are true? Comment boxes are standing by.

In the meantime hurry back tomorrow for the last installment of blogging week, Frumpy Friday.

And to generally annoy all those involved, let me tag the following entities with this overflowing meme:

• Count von Count of Sesame Street fame for teaching me how to count this high.
• Arubagirl for this gruesome picture of fiendish flora.

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This post is ensuring my own personal walk of shame over at humor-blogs.com

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